Ripples of life

I’m aware I’m not a regular blogger because a) it’s ages since I last posted, and mainly b) I’m constrained at times by a long held sense that I don’t have much to say that’s of value, which has been with me since childhood. This has contributed to a reticence on my part to engage that comes across as shyness or even introversion - as I sense it anyway.

So I’m pleased today to share about a revelation that’s just come to me.

Despite my perceived shyness I try to smile and greet my Hospital colleagues whatever their role. As a lead nurse and a role model this is important to me. One person I see most days has appeared to be uncomfortable to see me, and to not want to engage in anyway. And this has puzzled me; perhaps they are very shy too? Nonetheless I’ve tried to keep smiling at them.

My role in Palliative and End of Life Care can cast a shadow for some; after all a good proportion of the staff population of a regular sized hospital will be experiencing loss, bereavement and the anxiety that having investigations for potentially serious life limiting illness will bring. - either for themselves or people important to them. This reminds me of how much we don’t know about each other’s lives, so being sensitive and respectful is really helpful when we’re making connections.

And the revelation? Through social media I’ve discovered the person who I’d like to make a connection with has indeed been through significant loss. Seeing me (though I wasn’t involved in any professional way) may be too much of a reminder for them?

I’ve learnt they are using their experience to help others and clearly have been doing so for a while. So, I can support them in their next effort and I’ll endeavour to tell them in person about doing so when I see them next. I hope that will help each of us feel just a little more comfortable as we pass in the corridors.